Napkins may be mere pieces of cloth, but they can be tricky. Do you know what to do with it when you take a bathroom break or finish your meal? Or do you just make it up as you go along? We will review all the different ways to place your napkin while having dinner, and the faux-pas to avoid. Shall we start?

Does this look correct?

You may have seen this arrangement in medium-sized restaurants or bistros. It is considered appropriate for restaurants of a casual or mid-level style. You will never see it in a higher calibre restaurant, and of course you should avoid it at home. 

Do you sometimes use this?

The napkin ring was invented in the early 19th century by the French bourgeoisie. Traditionally, each member of a family had one, which was distinct from the other. Once the lunch or dinner was finished, the napkin was wrapped back in the ring. The reason for this was that back then the French bourgeoisie used large cotton napkins, which could be used throughout the whole day, from breakfast to dinner. They were changed only at the end of the day, or every 2 to 3 days for the not-so-wealthy families. Nowadays napkin rings are considered middle-class, and thus appropriate for bistros.

How should we place napkins when we set the table?

You can either place it on the plate, or to the left of it. Both are acceptable and suitable for restaurants or home receptions. Regarding the folding of the napkin, in myopinion you should not attempt something too complicated, unless you are confident you can do it right. Elegance doesn’t necessarily require complexity.

Put the napkins on the left of the plate

Put the napkins on the plate

When should you unfold it?

Here we are, the hostess has just sat down, so you can do the same (because, as you probably know, you are not supposed to take your seat before the hostess). You can now unfold the napkin and place it on your lap, even before being served your first course. 

Where should you place it when you need to leave?

If you will return, you should rest your napkin on the chair, on the seat, or on the arm, but never the back, which would be too visible and inelegant. This would indicate to the waiters that you are still present at the table, and that they should not remove your cutlery. 

Where and how should you place the napkin when you are done with dinner?

If you are done with your dinner, then you need to place the napkin on the table. This tells the waiter that you are finished with your meal, and ready for your plate and cutlery to be cleared. You could place your napkin on the right of the plate, which means the French style. While place it on the left is the British style. An easy way to remember it is that the French drive on the right-hand side of the road, and the British on the left, so that’s where they place their napkin at the end of their meal. 

French put the napkin on the right of the plate when they leave

British put the napkin on the left of the plate when they leave

Beware, here the faux-pas would be to fold it very precisely and clearly in the same way it was folded when the table was set. Once used, you should fold it gently, so that it doesn’t seem disarranged, but not too well. It must be obvious that it has been already used. 

I hope next time you go to a high-end restaurant you won’t hesitate about what to do with your napkin! Any questions? If yes, please do not hesitate to post your comments, I would be very happy to answer!